The above Quote is from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. This quote has an impressive amount of significance when it comes to my life and the future that I have indeed dreamed about.
I implore you, do not think I am clinically insane. I am, admittedly, unorthodox, but I am still very much a rational being.(That's what makes me dangerous :) lol) I have a belief that God will use any means of communication that he deems worthy. Sometimes he puts people in our life that will shape us, sometimes he uses situations that do the same. But I also believe that will communicate with those that he loves in ways that don't make sense. I believe that God can communicate to people through their consciences, their physical and mental feelings, and even through dreams. I do have to say, this does not give anyone the right to say, "Well I dreamed it, that must mean God wants me to do it." Any form of communication this way must be double checked with earlier forms of revelation, namely Common Sense and Scripture. (I am a Christian, so I do indeed mean the Bible.) In this, I do not by any means endorse the use of violence or sexual promiscuity. I have had dreams like that but it is against the plan of God and the rule of law to do such things. As such it renders these things null and void.
For Some reason God has used every method possible to kick me back onto the path that he has for me. My dreams are simple, but that is because I have learned my lesson from planning things out too much.
I have 5 primary wishes:
1. I wish to be a faithful man of God. - While this might seem trite, it is far from. This past month I have seen God do things that I have never seen before. His power has shaped my life and I want him to continue to work in my life. As such, I wish to be faithful in my walk with Him.
2. I wish to be a minister. - My career is one that is not very popular with people. I'm supposed to be this "pure example." But how does that look? I believe in the maturity of Christians and the Freedom of our Wills and Consciences by Christ. I desire to be an under-shepherd of Christ.
3. I wish to have a family. - I have a desire in my heart to find someone that I will be able to spend the rest of my life with. While this might be easy for some people as they have already found their significant other or are in a steady relationship, I am the perfect picture of failure in this area. I have never had a relationship that has lasted over 6 months. I have had relationships end because of something I have done, and even once it was something I didn't do. Every time, it gets more discouraging and it seems that maybe I will never find anyone. But, I will still hope.
4. I wish I could succeed. - I have been a "failure" in everything I have tried. I can't keep a girlfriend. I am still working for minimum wage. Also, this is my sixth year of college, and I will have to take a 7th in order to receive my diploma. Although I have learned much from my many faults, I would like things to go right once in my life.
5. I wish I could be truly content. - While I am content with most things in my life, I have a hard time being appreciative of all the things I do have. I have not been content with my position in life and it always seems like I am the one that is not getting the picture. It's hard to have desires you know you shouldn't, and then repressing them till you either don't care anymore, or they explode.
Quibbling Quandries:
What are your 5 wishes?
If you could be anything for a week, what would it be? (And I do mean anything)
What is your biggest stumbling block right now? How can it be overcome?
What is your perspective on current culture?
Interesting Illuminations:
What are the top 5 moments in your life, right now?
(In no particular order) My previous relationship, Playing organized soccer for 20 years, Attending Providence CC, my younger siblings in my life, the times God has worked in my life to let me know who I really am
When you look back on life, when were the easiest times to have hope?
Hope was easy when things were good. Now, things aren't so good, and it's easy to be cynical.
What is your favorite snack food?
Chocolate Milk, Hummus, and Pita Chips
How do you show love?
Physical touch, giving gifts, and quality time
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Friday, February 18, 2011
Who Am I?
In a previous post I said I would share about my present situation. I will do so, but probably not in the way you might like me to. In the Opera/Musical "Les Miserables" a main theme is the song, "Who am I?" This song is sung by both the protagonist and antagonist for much of the same reason, but with different reactions. I tend to think of myself as Jean Valjean. I have had a jaded past, more than most people. But, I have comfort in Jesus that it is his work that has saved me, not my own. I am studying to be a minister at a small, private college in Pasadena, California. I have recently had many things happen in my life, not all of them good. I have hurt some of the people around me in ways that can't be repaired. I know they have told me that they forgive me. Yet, forgiveness is not an easy thing for me to do to myself. I don't hold grudges against people and I have tried to move on, but living with the mistakes that I have done is not an easy thing for me.
Right now I am trying to get life back in order. I need to re-devote myself to my studies and to God. Sometimes I need a break form life. Like that will ever happen. :) If you want a quick peek into my brain for a little bit, (I know, random.) imagine those moments where you think of about 500 things at once. That is my brain normally. You should see it in overdrive.
Quibbling Quandaries:
What are the top 5 moments in your life, right now?
When you look back on life, when were the easiest times to have hope?
What is your favorite snack food?
How do you show love?
Interesting Illuminations:
Why do professors think they are being funny when they assign major papers all together on the same week?
- They are preparing us for hell: real life! lol
Is Diet Pop really healthier for you than Regular?
- Sugar wise, yes. But, there is a chemical in diet pop that can actually make you more hungry and therefore could end up to you eating more food.
How did the lump that our heart looks like turn into the "heart" shape that we have today?
- I have no idea!
What is your favorite game to play with friends?
- Anything that doesn't involve me getting ganged up on and annihilated. (I blame Chelsea Leigh and Dani Rae for this.) :)
Thanks for reading - TI :)
Right now I am trying to get life back in order. I need to re-devote myself to my studies and to God. Sometimes I need a break form life. Like that will ever happen. :) If you want a quick peek into my brain for a little bit, (I know, random.) imagine those moments where you think of about 500 things at once. That is my brain normally. You should see it in overdrive.
Quibbling Quandaries:
What are the top 5 moments in your life, right now?
When you look back on life, when were the easiest times to have hope?
What is your favorite snack food?
How do you show love?
Interesting Illuminations:
Why do professors think they are being funny when they assign major papers all together on the same week?
- They are preparing us for hell: real life! lol
Is Diet Pop really healthier for you than Regular?
- Sugar wise, yes. But, there is a chemical in diet pop that can actually make you more hungry and therefore could end up to you eating more food.
How did the lump that our heart looks like turn into the "heart" shape that we have today?
- I have no idea!
What is your favorite game to play with friends?
- Anything that doesn't involve me getting ganged up on and annihilated. (I blame Chelsea Leigh and Dani Rae for this.) :)
Thanks for reading - TI :)
Monday, February 14, 2011
Monthly Single Awareness Day Rant
Sorry that my first rant comes so soon, but I have history with this one: Valentine's Day.
I have 2 major bones to pick with this "O Sacred" of holidays.
First, the story of this holiday is anything but romantic. St. Valentine was a clergy member in Rome. He had helped Christians that had been persecuted during the reign of Claudius II. While helping some of these persecuted Christians, Valentine was captured by the Romans and imprisoned. While in prison, Valentine began correspondence with a young women. She was troubled by how such a good man could be in prison. Through the small window in his cell, Valentine talked with this women and eventually led her to faith. Contrary to many people's assumptions, this relationship was not romantic. This conversation between Valentine and the young lady continued until she fell ill. Yet, the correspondence did not stop. Valentine and the young woman continued to write to one another through a messenger. The legend goes that she never knew his name until the last letter he ever wrote. On the day he was executed, Valentine signed the final letter with his name: "Your Valentine." St. Valentine was executed on February 14. The way that this holiday became associated with love is due to the roman festival of love that occurred around the same time. Boys would choose a girl's name out of a jar and would then do something to woo the girl. This eventually degraded into a celebration of lust in our modern culture.
My second bone to pick has to do with my own personal history with this ever so popular holiday. I must admit something that everyone will probably say "Ya, that's common." I have never had a girlfriend on Valentine's Day. While all of my friends have coupled up, I am stuck being the 3rd/5th/7th wheel on Valentine's Day. As much as this hurts, it's worse when you look at what happens before V-Day. Out of the 10 years I have been interested in having a girlfriend on Valentine's Day, my "significant other"s and I have broken up within 2 weeks of Valentine's Day 6 times. Out of the 4 remaining, 3 I was too busy and 1 I just didn't care. (I used to be pretty jaded.) I have never had a good Valentine's Day... EVER. Sorry for the downer, but I am sick and tired of couples and advertisers telling me that I am supposed to be in a relationship when I either just got done with being in one, or am finally (for once in my life) content with being single. Sorry for the rant, but i had to get that out.
Quibbling Quandaries:
Why do professors think they are being funny when they assign major papers all together on the same week?
Is Diet Pop really healthier for you than Regular?
How did the lump that our heart looks like turn into the "heart" shape that we have today?
What is your favorite game to play with friends?
Interesting Illuminations:
When you still have feelings for someone, how long do you wait to tell them?
- It depends on the person telling and the timing for the person that it is about.
When you have a wonderful moment of "open mouth, insert foot" do you honestly tell the people involved, or try to wait and see what develops?
- I am still up in the air about this one.
What do you do when a friend gets between you and your significant other?
- The first question is: How are they doing it? Then act accordingly. Don't let a good thing go just because a friend has reservations. But, don't blow him/her off. S/he might have a good point.
When is it okay to lie to a friend?
- I struggle to say yes to this one. But, If they are a friend, they will take the truth, even when it hurts.
Is a massive cover up okay to protect a friend?
- I don't like doing it, and I don't want to be put in the position to do it. That is the only answer I will give here.
I have 2 major bones to pick with this "O Sacred" of holidays.
First, the story of this holiday is anything but romantic. St. Valentine was a clergy member in Rome. He had helped Christians that had been persecuted during the reign of Claudius II. While helping some of these persecuted Christians, Valentine was captured by the Romans and imprisoned. While in prison, Valentine began correspondence with a young women. She was troubled by how such a good man could be in prison. Through the small window in his cell, Valentine talked with this women and eventually led her to faith. Contrary to many people's assumptions, this relationship was not romantic. This conversation between Valentine and the young lady continued until she fell ill. Yet, the correspondence did not stop. Valentine and the young woman continued to write to one another through a messenger. The legend goes that she never knew his name until the last letter he ever wrote. On the day he was executed, Valentine signed the final letter with his name: "Your Valentine." St. Valentine was executed on February 14. The way that this holiday became associated with love is due to the roman festival of love that occurred around the same time. Boys would choose a girl's name out of a jar and would then do something to woo the girl. This eventually degraded into a celebration of lust in our modern culture.
My second bone to pick has to do with my own personal history with this ever so popular holiday. I must admit something that everyone will probably say "Ya, that's common." I have never had a girlfriend on Valentine's Day. While all of my friends have coupled up, I am stuck being the 3rd/5th/7th wheel on Valentine's Day. As much as this hurts, it's worse when you look at what happens before V-Day. Out of the 10 years I have been interested in having a girlfriend on Valentine's Day, my "significant other"s and I have broken up within 2 weeks of Valentine's Day 6 times. Out of the 4 remaining, 3 I was too busy and 1 I just didn't care. (I used to be pretty jaded.) I have never had a good Valentine's Day... EVER. Sorry for the downer, but I am sick and tired of couples and advertisers telling me that I am supposed to be in a relationship when I either just got done with being in one, or am finally (for once in my life) content with being single. Sorry for the rant, but i had to get that out.
Quibbling Quandaries:
Why do professors think they are being funny when they assign major papers all together on the same week?
Is Diet Pop really healthier for you than Regular?
How did the lump that our heart looks like turn into the "heart" shape that we have today?
What is your favorite game to play with friends?
Interesting Illuminations:
When you still have feelings for someone, how long do you wait to tell them?
- It depends on the person telling and the timing for the person that it is about.
When you have a wonderful moment of "open mouth, insert foot" do you honestly tell the people involved, or try to wait and see what develops?
- I am still up in the air about this one.
What do you do when a friend gets between you and your significant other?
- The first question is: How are they doing it? Then act accordingly. Don't let a good thing go just because a friend has reservations. But, don't blow him/her off. S/he might have a good point.
When is it okay to lie to a friend?
- I struggle to say yes to this one. But, If they are a friend, they will take the truth, even when it hurts.
Is a massive cover up okay to protect a friend?
- I don't like doing it, and I don't want to be put in the position to do it. That is the only answer I will give here.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Successful Failings
Here's a special treat. 2 post in 2 days! Don't get used to it.
In my first blog post I claimed I was an over age college student. I can hear the outcries now, "You are never to old to go back to school!" The truth is, I never left. This is my 6th year of college. I set out in August of 2005 at a little known college in Iowa. I was bright eyed and eager to learn. Yet, as I progressed through school, I learned some very hard lessons. I learned that teachers lie and students are gullible enough to believe it. I also learned that private schools are just as sympathetic as public schools. To a certain extent, less so than public schools. I was run out of my old school on a rail.
I was decried as a heretic in 3 of my classes. It could have been more, but these were the ones that I remember. I was the one person that always sat alone in class. I was the lone student in the corner that would challenge the teacher. This got me glares from not only the teacher but also the students around me. In the movie Expelled by Ben Stein, he opens it up as the one student that questions the teacher. This leads the class to thinking critically about what the teacher was saying and leads to some disapproving stares at the teacher. The difference between the movie and my situation was the reaction of the class. I would regularly get stared down by all the students in the class as well. This led to me doing a rather inflammatory project that aired the dirty laundry of the college, and eventually led to my dismissal from that institution.
But the fun doesn't end there, in the past I have worked in multiple industries, ranging from private security to food service. The only jobs I didn't get fired from were my security job(I was freelance till the work dried up) and being a delivery driver at Pizza Hut(I left to go back to school). I was told by many people, including my parents, that I was supposed to do something great. So far I have failed at anything resembling a normal life or some type of success in the world. My most stable job was working for the local Census Bureau over the summer. In life, many people see me as a failure. I can't help thinking the same, sometimes.
However, the story does not end there. Now that you know a little about my past, my present and future will be on display in the up coming posts.
Quibbling Quandaries:
When you still have feelings for someone, how long do you wait to tell them?
When you have a wonderful moment of "open mouth, insert foot" do you honestly tell the people involved, or try to wait and see what develops?
What do you do when a friend gets between you and your significant other?
When is it okay to lie to a friend?
Is a massive cover up okay to protect a friend?
Interesting Illuminations:
Why do women think that bugging their guy friends is cute?
- It's an attention thing. Many times it's just frustrating to the guy.
Do "no strings attached" relationships really have "no strings attached?"
- Bull! There is no way a "no strings attached" relationship has no strings attached. A relationship deals with the whole person. It ties up a person emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. If you want more of the reasoning behind this, comment please.
Who's job is education? How does he/she/they do it?
- 3 places: Church, Home, School. In thought, desire, and deed.
In my first blog post I claimed I was an over age college student. I can hear the outcries now, "You are never to old to go back to school!" The truth is, I never left. This is my 6th year of college. I set out in August of 2005 at a little known college in Iowa. I was bright eyed and eager to learn. Yet, as I progressed through school, I learned some very hard lessons. I learned that teachers lie and students are gullible enough to believe it. I also learned that private schools are just as sympathetic as public schools. To a certain extent, less so than public schools. I was run out of my old school on a rail.
I was decried as a heretic in 3 of my classes. It could have been more, but these were the ones that I remember. I was the one person that always sat alone in class. I was the lone student in the corner that would challenge the teacher. This got me glares from not only the teacher but also the students around me. In the movie Expelled by Ben Stein, he opens it up as the one student that questions the teacher. This leads the class to thinking critically about what the teacher was saying and leads to some disapproving stares at the teacher. The difference between the movie and my situation was the reaction of the class. I would regularly get stared down by all the students in the class as well. This led to me doing a rather inflammatory project that aired the dirty laundry of the college, and eventually led to my dismissal from that institution.
But the fun doesn't end there, in the past I have worked in multiple industries, ranging from private security to food service. The only jobs I didn't get fired from were my security job(I was freelance till the work dried up) and being a delivery driver at Pizza Hut(I left to go back to school). I was told by many people, including my parents, that I was supposed to do something great. So far I have failed at anything resembling a normal life or some type of success in the world. My most stable job was working for the local Census Bureau over the summer. In life, many people see me as a failure. I can't help thinking the same, sometimes.
However, the story does not end there. Now that you know a little about my past, my present and future will be on display in the up coming posts.
Quibbling Quandaries:
When you still have feelings for someone, how long do you wait to tell them?
When you have a wonderful moment of "open mouth, insert foot" do you honestly tell the people involved, or try to wait and see what develops?
What do you do when a friend gets between you and your significant other?
When is it okay to lie to a friend?
Is a massive cover up okay to protect a friend?
Interesting Illuminations:
Why do women think that bugging their guy friends is cute?
- It's an attention thing. Many times it's just frustrating to the guy.
Do "no strings attached" relationships really have "no strings attached?"
- Bull! There is no way a "no strings attached" relationship has no strings attached. A relationship deals with the whole person. It ties up a person emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. If you want more of the reasoning behind this, comment please.
Who's job is education? How does he/she/they do it?
- 3 places: Church, Home, School. In thought, desire, and deed.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Numero Uno
Hi all.
This is my first blog post here on blogger. I have had many blogs before, but they have never really taken off. The design of the main blog section is to follow my life as an over age college student in Pasadena, California. I study religion and the inter-workings, thereof. However, I am multifaceted. So please do not think that this will be some religious blog, bashing the daylights out of everything that seems "wrong." Just to give you a sample: I like sports, books, music, writing, and girls. ;) I had to throw that out there.
I will try to update as regularly as possible but, life happens. So, no promises.
Another section I will have is random thoughts. I will post thoughts and questions that I have wrestled with throughout the day. These will be varied. I will post my answers to these questions in my next blog post.
First question set:
Why do women think that bugging their guy friends is cute?
Do "no strings attached" relationships really have "no strings attached?"
Who's job is education? How does he/she/they do it?
One more thing, I LOVE comments. If I hit something on the head, tell me. If I am being an ass, tell me. If you have an answer for one of the questions I posted, by all means COMMENT! Just sayin'. :) TTYL TI
This is my first blog post here on blogger. I have had many blogs before, but they have never really taken off. The design of the main blog section is to follow my life as an over age college student in Pasadena, California. I study religion and the inter-workings, thereof. However, I am multifaceted. So please do not think that this will be some religious blog, bashing the daylights out of everything that seems "wrong." Just to give you a sample: I like sports, books, music, writing, and girls. ;) I had to throw that out there.
I will try to update as regularly as possible but, life happens. So, no promises.
Another section I will have is random thoughts. I will post thoughts and questions that I have wrestled with throughout the day. These will be varied. I will post my answers to these questions in my next blog post.
First question set:
Why do women think that bugging their guy friends is cute?
Do "no strings attached" relationships really have "no strings attached?"
Who's job is education? How does he/she/they do it?
One more thing, I LOVE comments. If I hit something on the head, tell me. If I am being an ass, tell me. If you have an answer for one of the questions I posted, by all means COMMENT! Just sayin'. :) TTYL TI
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